Dog bites Man!

Graphic re-creation of orginal wound...

In my part of Poland, if you live out in one of the small villages, at some point you'll be thinking about the relative hordes of wild dogs (dziki pies) out in the abyss of farmland, fields and mildly mountainous terrain... ok maybe not 'hordes' but maybe small gatherings of dogs is more accurate.

I've heard several near miss experiences with wild dogs from local fisherman. Several now go fishing 'tooled' with pepper spray, sonic deterrents or in some cases handguns. Often when the street lighting goes out in my village, which is an often occurrence, you can see packs of dogs swaggering through the village (7 or 8+), causing other domestic dogs to go into crazy barking mode. If I was on the street when those dogs moseyed through I would definitely shit myself. The 'packs' seem to be made up of a collection of all dogs in various shapes and sizes which is surprising because I assumed the bigger dogs would merely eat the smaller ones.

Only once, when walking between villages during the night have I encountered wild dogs, but there was only two, it was terribly cold weather and I probably looked quite intimidating in my big winter jacket so nothing kicked off. But definitely I keep my wits about me when walking outside the village.

I've been aware of wild dogs from more or less my beginnings in Poland when another English teacher pointed out a pack running through the fields from our bus window, but to be honest in general it's not a real problem in Poland any more than it is in the U.K, or in Moscow where they even use the metro to commute around the city?! it's just something you need to be aware of.


Łódż Gazeta
The Sun (Moscow commuting dogs)

And of course, dogs with owners are far more dangerous as I found out on Saturday whilst walking up the stairs of a block of flats to a new students house. As soon as I passed an old, drunk man, who was staring out of the window with his dog, the little runt bit me :( and as I complained to the owner the only reply I got was 'Spoko', 'Relax'. Easy for you to say I thought, you don't need to teach a medical English class with blood dripping down your leg, I mean I'm very pro-using realia in classrooms but that's a little extreme! all through the lesson I was thinking that probably looking at the state of the owner, the dog and the blood I could feel dripping down my leg I would need to go to the hospital for an injection. the prospect of this didn't fill me with joy as it sounded expensive and I've had dog bite injections before and they make you feel like shit.

Instead, I braved my next classes at Uni and purchased an antiseptic wound dressing from Rossman and applied it to my leg before my next lesson. Only half way through the lesson did I realise the dressing had made my leg completely numb and incapable of walking normally but only with a swagger like a drunkard, hilarity for my students.

and when I got home to my doting wife who cleaned up my wounds what was I left with...
a mark so small my wife burst into laughter... thanks honey.